lately ive been thinking about trust, and where it comes from and how we as humans find the means to objectives to maintain it.
unfortunately, and often unbeknownst to the majority of the populous, it is my opinion that a person, or we as people unintentionally decide who they want to trust from the moment they meet them.
based on nothing more reliable than my own meandering experience, if you meet someone, develop feelings of friendship or other fondness, and are hesitant to actually *WANT* to trust someone because you have been hurt in the past; you will FIND reasons to not trust them.
In my personal experience, your subconscious will unintentionally and parenthetically CREATE reasons and prove theory's from circumstances within your outlook to justify this. i find this to not only be counter productive , but in the end, you will inevitably come out on the losing end. beit hurt feelings, or "wow that really happened"
illegitimate way of recovering from past bad experiences. though you may have thought you were justified in finding the person you have grown to care about you will lose. you cheat yourself.
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Kayla Maynard "We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospection." -Anais Nin
How green are *you*
The gills....errr....facts
So...the ever revealing "about me".....
This blog archives all the way from my enlistment into the US Navy as an ITSN, through ITSN school, almost marrying the wrong person, being tricked/suckered into Marrying the wrong one, the pain that accompanies receiving "i would like a divorce" email while being away protecting a nation,
i am an enlightened smart ass, I exceed my own expectations, abate my own vocabulary so that my loved ones don’t have to carry a thesaurus, listen when the elderly speak, live to serve others, and love every member of my family indefinitely.
though i am non denominational, i do my best to serve and honor my lord and savior, jesus christ.Because of his saving grace, i am never alone. He turned me into somebody loved :)
With very little effort, i have the ability to brighten just about anyones day, and make the most hardened person laugh.My sunny demeanor is infectious, and people like being around me. I am doing my best to just focus on taking things day by day and getting out of this god forsaken war torn country. Painting and cooking are my passions, and my only true vices. I have come to learn that i should never make someone a priority when they make me an option. I was created by my father in heaven out of passion, tenderness, strength, fearlessness and ambition. (I am working on developing the patience part).
My family is my reason for living, and i am very protective of them and my closest friends. I refuse to demand anything more or less from them than i would/wouldnt do myself.Most of the time, they make me proud. I never thought i would be entering my thirties with the absence of a love of my life by my side, but dwelling on lonliness and misfortune and lonliness is anthrax to the soul, So i am making the best of it. I will leave this place,return home to my turtle, ready to conquor the world and begin a new chapter in my life. Yes,i said my turtle. I have the worlds most awesome and supportive mother who still thinks the world of me, and I have a sensational friend whom i've grown rather attatched to here that is reminding me that i am a beautiful, amazing person, helping me through this rough spot in my life :)He makes me laugh so hard i snort through my nose on a regular basis.HE HAS PICKED MY BOOGERS!!he is a blessing.He joins the ranks with the rest of my amazing support system of friends and family, with very little effort. So, i'm good :)
I am currently stationed in ghazni, afghanistan filling the billet of a combat engineer, and loving almost every minute of it. Our teams mission is to open the local peoples hearts and minds to the idea of freedom and democracy. I dream big, love generously, live simply, and speak kindly, however this fails to keep me from telling things the way they are. I pride myself on honesty, and apparently there lacks a serious audience for sincerety these days, so my fans are often outnumbered by unhappy people who had it coming. lol. I am an avid fan of the outdoors, and marry poppins and star wars are my favorite movies. That's me. practically imperfect in every way:)
This blog archives all the way from my enlistment into the US Navy as an ITSN, through ITSN school, almost marrying the wrong person, being tricked/suckered into Marrying the wrong one, the pain that accompanies receiving "i would like a divorce" email while being away protecting a nation,
i am an enlightened smart ass, I exceed my own expectations, abate my own vocabulary so that my loved ones don’t have to carry a thesaurus, listen when the elderly speak, live to serve others, and love every member of my family indefinitely.
though i am non denominational, i do my best to serve and honor my lord and savior, jesus christ.Because of his saving grace, i am never alone. He turned me into somebody loved :)
With very little effort, i have the ability to brighten just about anyones day, and make the most hardened person laugh.My sunny demeanor is infectious, and people like being around me. I am doing my best to just focus on taking things day by day and getting out of this god forsaken war torn country. Painting and cooking are my passions, and my only true vices. I have come to learn that i should never make someone a priority when they make me an option. I was created by my father in heaven out of passion, tenderness, strength, fearlessness and ambition. (I am working on developing the patience part).
My family is my reason for living, and i am very protective of them and my closest friends. I refuse to demand anything more or less from them than i would/wouldnt do myself.Most of the time, they make me proud. I never thought i would be entering my thirties with the absence of a love of my life by my side, but dwelling on lonliness and misfortune and lonliness is anthrax to the soul, So i am making the best of it. I will leave this place,return home to my turtle, ready to conquor the world and begin a new chapter in my life. Yes,i said my turtle. I have the worlds most awesome and supportive mother who still thinks the world of me, and I have a sensational friend whom i've grown rather attatched to here that is reminding me that i am a beautiful, amazing person, helping me through this rough spot in my life :)He makes me laugh so hard i snort through my nose on a regular basis.HE HAS PICKED MY BOOGERS!!he is a blessing.He joins the ranks with the rest of my amazing support system of friends and family, with very little effort. So, i'm good :)
I am currently stationed in ghazni, afghanistan filling the billet of a combat engineer, and loving almost every minute of it. Our teams mission is to open the local peoples hearts and minds to the idea of freedom and democracy. I dream big, love generously, live simply, and speak kindly, however this fails to keep me from telling things the way they are. I pride myself on honesty, and apparently there lacks a serious audience for sincerety these days, so my fans are often outnumbered by unhappy people who had it coming. lol. I am an avid fan of the outdoors, and marry poppins and star wars are my favorite movies. That's me. practically imperfect in every way:)
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