heart, weakened and vulnerable

for some reason, i am super disheartened these past two weeks. I go through the day, and for the first time in a loooong time, i feel so alone. abandoned by the person who promised to protect me from the hurt in the When i step off of the plane in san diego, when i am finished doing my work here, where the fuck am i going to live??
additionally, i am missing my family more than ever.
so this song reads/speaks my emotions at this particular point in time.
So i leave you,

45
by shinedown

Send away for a priceless gift
One not subtle, one not on the list
Send away for a perfect world
One not simply, so absurd
In these times of doing what you're told
Keep these feelings, no one knows
What ever happened to the young man's heart
Swallowed by pain, as he slowly fell apart

And I'm staring down the barrel of a 45,
I'm swimming through the ashes of another life
There's no real reason to accept the way things have changed
Staring down the barrel of a 45

Send a message to the unborn child
Keep your eyes open for a while
In a box high up on the shelf, left for you, no one else
There's a piece of a puzzle known as life
Wrapped in guilt, sealed up tight

What ever happened to the young man's heart
Swallowed by pain, as he slowly fell apart

[CHORUS]

Everyone's pointing their fingers
Always condemning me
And nobody knows what I believe